I've tried to find the words to say
How I feel about you going away
But they always come out so mean
And that's not how they should seem

So instead I've been staying away
Not calling anymore to come and hang
I bite my tongue and smile, keep in all inside
They only way I have to cope with this is to hide

The only way I know
To let you go
        Is to act as if you aren't even there
Then what will it matter? What will I care?

As part of my heart quietly dies
And all the tears blur my eyes
And breathing becomes such a labor
And feeling the pain of you leaving is a favor

Because the other choice is feeling nothing at all
And I'd rather at least suffer, than hide behind my logical wall

But I can't live my life in this time 'til you leave
Crying and hurting, constantly grieved
So I detach, until something causes me to dwell
On the things between us that aren't so well

It's become pretty easy to see
That I love you more than you love me
But that's okay to some degree
Because I can't be every friend you need

And I'll take whatever you'll let me be
Even if it means you pulled others closer than me
For I can keep working to strengthen us and we
Oh wait - now I can't, 'cause you're off to Cali

And it's hurting me so
To let you go
        But what choice do I have?
Being utterly selfish is not who I am

I would NEVER begrudge Jeremy his success
And all I have in my heart for him is the best
You're support of his dream never ceases to impress
And I very much understand why you must do this

That's the only reason I haven't tried to dissuade you
And believe me I have plenty of ways to

So here we are back again:

Silence and logic my only defense
That my true natures won't win against
And it puts a divide between you and me
One I'm not even sure that you see

The only way I know
To let you go
        Is to act as if you aren't even there
Then what will it matter? What will I care?

As part of my heart quietly dies
And all the tears blur my eyes
And every breath becomes a labor
There is nothing left to savor

I know what pain this is
Been through it before
Though not in this way
... I closed that door

It's almost the worst there can be
My best friend leaving me

And despite what you might say
About coming to visit, and chatting online each day
I already live the life of a best friend far away
It's not the same
        And the relationship will change

Maybe, by the Grace of God, and no other
I'll be lucky enough to one day to get another
But women like you are so rare a find
Heck it took me years to get you to bind

And even now I learn
Though I had my turn
Somehow I wasn't enough
And not being your best friend now is rough

Because as you leave our lives separate
And there is no longer I can wait
For you to have the time to come around
(God, how desperate do I sound...)
No more chance to displace
One who I wish hadn't returned*
        *I know that doesn't rhyme

But as you are about to go
What I really want you to know
Is that I love you more than Jessy alone

Leaving Kevin, Ashley and Laura aside
She's the one that really makes me snide
But this poem should be about you and I

So back here we are again:

And though it's hurting me so
To let you go
        When the time comes to leave
Do you want to watch me grieve?
Or do you want happy me?

For I will always try to be
        whatever it is that you need