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Monday, March 12, 2007Last Night's DreamI went back to school. Sat in, chose my (two) classes. Spent the next couple days moving in to dorm room, two roommates. Realized I'd been at school three, no four!, days and hadn't told work yet! Figured since classes were M,W,F only could work normally Tu, Th, and work something out for the rest of the week (maybe weekend?).Went out... Ma in hospital, won't take medicine. Twisting, fussing. (Almost like Nana?) Dad there, and one other... Michael? Finally get her to take medicine (I think), didn't want to stay (Dad didn't?), so we leave. On way back into dorm, have my arms full as I walk in. See RA with a group of the girls about to head out to do (can't remember). I wanted to go, it seemed like fun. But had things I needed to do in my arms. Also noticed they were all dressed similar, in black pants and matching white(?) tops. Tried to rush to room, drop things off and change and try to make it back to catch them. Noticed I was already wearing black pants and possibly a good enough top. But felt I wasn't going to make it back in time. Somehow ended up on cell phone on way back to room. Ma wouldn't eat the hospital food and wanted to go home. At same time, Emily was on the phone. Managed to convince Ma not to leave the hospital, due to weather (I think) which Emily told me about, and got her to agree to eat (don't know if she actually did), and hung up with her. Talked to Emily a bit. Fumbled with keys somewhere along the way, but managed to get into where my dorm room was. Emily showed up! Surprised me at doorway between courtyard and dorm room building. Er, stuff here. Jericho came with her! We talk, laugh. More stuff about the weather and how it's warm here now, except at night where you're tricked by MI/MA and it's back to cold and ice. Go into dorm building from courtyard. Emily gets along *really* well with some of my friends, there are more people I know as friends there too, mostly all from MA. When time comes, Emily doesn't want to leave, and Jericho kinda doesn't either but he knows they have to. Sad faces, hemming and hawing. Everyone sits down for dinner in a dining hall with big round tables. Conversation. Someone comments somehow about a song I love, so I start to sing it from the beginning for her - "Each day I live, I want to be A day to give, the best of me." - and she does the "Yeah! That's it, that's how it starts," happy to have figured it out thing. After everyone's beyond that, I keep singing, because I do love that song ("One Moment In Time" by Whitney Houston). I try to sing soft enough not to interrupt others, but their conversations make it so I can barely be heard. I think to stop, just give up, but decide to be selfish and sing so they hear me instead of me having to be silent for them. As I do, I notice a woman across the table from me who also has a great voice - Vivian from "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" - mouthing the words as I sing. She was singing them too, but I couldn't hear her. I keep singing, some people listen, most don't. Then, slowly, others join in with me. Soon the entire room has quieted and is listening or singing along. Then I hear a familiar voice amongst all the others, singing the song perfectly. It wasn't singing any louder than the rest of us, but the voice stood out anyway. I know who it is, and I look over to see Whitney Houston standing between tables singing with us! She's smiling. We keep singing, the whole song. As it goes on, I decided to try and sing louder than the others, to get my voice heard. And I sing well. I sing right on, perfect like how I learned the song from the radio. Whitney starts to sing a aria-like part to the song, adding her voice talents in a new way. It's as if she hands off to me singing the song as it was written, while she adds new features to it as we go along. I am able, but barely, to hold the notes as long as she near the end where the song gets intense. When we finish, I look at her, already having enjoyed myself. And she turns to me with a big smile, laughing even, and leans over to reach me (gives me five?) as she nods enthusiastically and tells me that was great! WOW! I got to sing with Whitney Houston, and she thought I was good! Just as people start saying things, and the dream is likely to turn to something next, my alarm goes off and I wake up. Renewed. Hopeful? I haven't felt like this in a while. Like there's something I'm working towards in my life. Like I have a dream. (Those two sentences being about different things.) There's a whole lot in that dream I've already been analyzing. Some can be interpreted in a couple ways, some could just be what they are. Some are direct results of yesterday (I watched a "Fresh Prince" Marathon), and finally getting some non-roleplaying time with two friends of mine. Oh I hope this motivation leads to something I will works towards long(er) term. Or maybe if it even just gets me into a volunteer position where I feel I'm helping others and can keep up with doing that I'll be okay... *sigh* |
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